Tuesday 5 July 2011

I feel Trapped :-(

I'm conflicted. Sometimes I realise in many ways I'm the luckiest person in the world. I should have died 'months' ago. I should've remained on that plane, died along with everyone else when that plane blew up. But I'm here. Alive. I've seen so many incredible things. I've actually stepped into history! Nothing really prepares you for that. And nothing is quite as convincing as the actual smells! I mean, you see it, you hear it. But you get that all the time with films...it's smelling the past that really makes you realise you're actually there!

Anyway, I said I was conflicted. I mean by that....I also wish I wasn't stuck here. I know I'm not exactly in a prison cell, I've got all of New York to wonder around in....even if it IS the same two days, I guess if I wondered through every street in Manhattan it would take me quite a few years before I've seen everything that happens at least once. If you see what I mean? But I can't help feeling trapped in these two days. Every monday morning, I see the same breakfast news on our tv. The same stories, the same lame jokes between newscasters. The same commercial breaks. The same weather forecasts.

Sometimes, I really do wish I could get up, walk out through the shutter door and never look back. I have been tempted you know. I have wondered what would happen. Would the agency track me down? Would the agency make sure I disappeared for good this time? And really...could I leave Sal and Liam like that?

I don't think so. It's tempting. But I guess the three of us are family now.

Oh...and here's another couple of Sal's sketches. I think the one with Bob and Liam was them playing chess a while back. Bob totally owned Liam! Not surprising really, since Bob downloaded the 'Big Blue' chess programme before they sat down to play.

3 comments:

  1. Keep going Maddy, you're doing great.

    Come meet me at 53.44369496028417, -1.3582921028137207 on the 6th of July 2011 at 13:20 as I'm just off out and I'll buy you a coffee!

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  2. Hey Mads.You surely haven't explored all of New York? Maybe you have, but, I'm just sayin'.

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  3. U r so mean ui. How cud u say dat? Madyy is just doin her best!

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